Thanksgiving with Family

I have asked my extended family to visit me several times. I've mentioned it in casual conversation a lot. Well, my brother's family took me up on the invitation and came for Thanksgiving. It was wonderful!
One of the benefits of having guests is that I clean my house. This time while getting the office sort of ready for someone to sleep in it I found this:

 Crazy isn't it? Apparently I thought that I might need to edit my thesis again someday along with a bunch of other files that are now in a landfill. I haven't even owned a computer that could read these in years. Why did I keep them? Hmmm.
While having a clean house is a nice benefit, the best part was spending time with great people. ... I think they are telling me how cool I am in the photo below.

Another added benefit is that I can now say that I have cooked a complete Thanksgiving meal! I've cooked parts of the meal many times, but this year I was the host and got to plan the menu and carry it out. As you can tell by the happy faces I did OK. They didn't even mind that my table cloth didn't really cover the whole way.

We had a great time playing nurtz, seeing the monuments in DC and some of the Smithsonian Museums. Also, they got a taste of Thomas Jefferson's legacy. We didn't really have time to tour the house, but how can you come here and not at least check out TJ's property? RD particularly liked the chair that TJ designed.

While the visit was short it was incredibly sweet. I loved spending time with family and I hope that they come again.

Is She REALLY a Mormon?

I've changed jobs recently. For a couple of years I had the privilege of being the assistant principal at CATEC and now I'm at JP Burley Middle School. Of course as soon as faculty and staff learn the name of the new assistant principal they start asking around to find out whatever they can. I would do the same thing to find out what kind of person my new supervisor might be.

When I arrived at CATEC the rumors were flying around about my age (28) and experience (lack of). It was interesting to notice the difference in my interactions with them when they learned that I was really a lot older. In fact it was very amusing because instantly I gained more respect. I guess that two years later I must already look a lot older because I haven't heard rumblings about my age at all...

A week or so ago some of my CATEC friends met up unexpectedly with my new Burley colleagues at a local bar. When Burley folks found out that the other group was from CATEC they asked them for "the dirt" on me. CATEC responded that there isn't any dirt-- that I don't even drink. I'm told that the next question was, "Is she really a Mormon?". I find that to be very interesting. Apparently the most important question wasn't whether I was a good educator, supervisor, or person. It was an incredulous, "Is she really a Mormon?".

I'm not entirely sure what to make of this. Maybe it means nothing. But seriously, is that really the most important thing to find out about a new person?

My New Middle School Life

A few weeks ago I began a new job at JP Burley Middle School. I officially started the day after teachers returned for the new year. It should go without saying that I have been scrambling to learn the ropes and make the adjustment. It was great to meet the faculty and staff and work for a few days with them. We specifically worked to analyze data in order to know where we are to be able to continue to improve.

One of my first tasks was to find the budget information and then to allocate funds to teachers, departments, and clubs. Of course since we are in a recession there is about 35% less than the previous budget. One of my first interactions was to tell teachers how much less they got. I was not a huge star.

Now enough with the serious stuff let's get to the fun & positive differences:

On the night of open house the first thing a student said to me was, "your pretty!". That was a great way to start the year.

The first day of school I got to spend a lot of time with the 6th graders who couldn't go to class because they didn't have their shots. I kept trying to make their first day good in spite of the lameness of having to stay in the conference room. --Can you imagine getting all excited/scared for the first day at a new school and not being able to spend time with any friends or teachers?--  Anyway, one boy who was particularly closed off said at the end of the day, "You are trying to make me smile" (through sort of a small grin)

We had a fire drill the first week as required and they did a great job. I was down with the 6th & 7th graders. They were very quick and quiet. After the all clear I said something like, "give yourself a hand- that was great!". Weeeellll, I found out quickly that the teacher demand silence throughout the entire fire drill. It was a very funny moment for me.

It is great to be at a community school where there are parents to help.

As predicted there is a lot of drama. Superlatives are often used when they aren't really appropriate. The funny thing is that the teachers are often the ones doing it.

I miss my friends at CATEC, but I think it will be a great year!

European Vacation

Saturday, July 17th Krista and I landed in Frankfurt and drove to Brussels where we tried to stay awake by walking around and seeing sights all day. Sunday we went to church there and it was in English, French, and Dutch. About half the congregation had head sets and they would take them off when the person at the podium was speaking their language. The bishop conducted in English, one sacrament prayer was French, one was English, and the talks were mostly in Dutch. While in Brussels we toured a chocolate museum (with samples), a musical instrument museum, a general museum, and saw lots of cool stuff at the Grand Place.

Monday we drove to Brugge, Belgium which is a quaint medieval city. It is the kind of place that you just want to stay and explore because it had so many interesting buildings and spaces. We didn't stay long though because we had to be at the airport Tuesday to get Kara and Blake. So we drove back to Frankfurt and stayed there that night.

Tuesday we all drove to Caen, France and arrived kind of late so the hotels were all full. At each place we asked if they knew of any vacancies elsewhere until we finally found rooms. The hotel had bunkbeds and the room Krista and I stayed in was stinky.

Wednesday we went to Normandy to see the D Day beaches and the American Cemetery which was very moving! We also went to Mont San Michel which is a sort of castle on an island. That evening I did a job interview over Skype. We stopped at a hotel and I paid for the internet for an hour and used my iPhone to do the call. I sat in a corner of the hotel bar and tried to focus on the questions. It was kind of amazing. It was a bit difficult to switch from vacation mode to job speak. Especially with my friends looking at me from the restaurant.

Thursday we stayed in a town where some of Blake's ancestors lived. We spent a couple of hours in the archive doing research and then we drove to a couple of places his ancestor lived. There was even a plaque on one of the buildings. After that we saw castles the rest of the day.

Friday we drove to La Neuveville, Switzerland which is a village where Blake's ancestors were Bergers (town  leaders). He had been corresponding with the museum people in regards to finding records and they rolled out the red carpet for him. We met the current Bergermeister and got to go into the archives where we saw letters, records, and bibles from the 12th century to the 14th century. It was amazing. They were handling the letters and stuff as if they were just received in the mail, yet they still had the ribbon and wax seal from the original senders and the bibles were written entirely in calligraphy. We also drove by and took pictures at the Swiss Temple. That night we stayed at Rheinfalls which they compare to Niagara Falls and we saw them the next morning before we left to drive to Germany.

Saturday we were in the car most of the day because we were stuck on the Autobahn for over two hours in a traffic jam with no movement. So instead of arriving at the Freiberg Temple at 5:30 or 6 we got there around 9:30pm and rushed to get our laundry done by midnight in the small European washers like Mom and Dad had in Siberia. It was great to see Krista & Kara's dad and meet his new wife (who is much nicer than the last one).

Sunday we went to church and got to attend the missionary class in English. There was only one investigator and he is in Germany attending the university and is Chinese. He had a Chinese Book of Mormon, but the sisters had to teach him in English because they don't know Chinese. I'm not sure why they didn't do it in German, but that may be another story. It was a powerful class. The sisters asked everyone to share their favorite Book of Mormon scripture. It turned out that the scriptures that were shared were specific answers to the prayers and needs of the investigator. I was struck by a Chinese man being in Germany, conversing with Americans, and getting specifically what he needed. God cares about each of us individually!

Monday we got up early to catch a bus to Prague where we spent the day. We were running a bit behind schedule to meet the bus and then we ran into a closed road. We couldn't find a way around it so I just drove through it anyway. A motorcycle followed me which gave me confidence until I saw a giant road grater (or something like that) working on the road and coming straight at us. It was at the very end when we were almost all of the way through with only 200 yards to go. So I simply drove around it and continued on our way. I later learned that Krista and Kara were surprised (not appalled as I thought) by my actions and never would have done it. I simply figured that I could play the naive American if we were stopped...

In Prague we saw the church where Good King Wenceslas is buried along with lots of cool things. We also saw the Jewish section, the famous bridge, and more. Additionally we ate great chocolate.

Tuesday we went to the temple and did a session along with some sealings afterwards. Then we left for Rothenburg, Germany which is a fascinating place. It wasn't bombed during WW II because enemy generals made a deal as they recognized its value as an authentic medieval town. It still has its wall all the way around and motes and everything.

Wednesday we drove to Frankfurt and did some shopping then got Blake and Kara to the airport Thursday morning. Krista and I drove to Mainz which is the hometown of Gutenberg who invented movable type and a printing process. It was another cool place with mostly modern buildings with some older stuff thrown in.

Friday we did a boat tour of the Rhine River and Saturday we stopped and took pictures at the Frankfurt temple and then got on the plane for home.
We probably planned too much, but I'm very glad that I went and I'm also very tired. Here are some lists I made while traveling:

Loved:
Self cleaning toilet seats
Going fast on the autobahn (I went over 200 km/hr to make up time on the way to Dresden)
Traveling with friends
Chocolate
Hopefully free hotel slippers
Freiberg temple
Seeing beautiful sights
Family history - even tho' not mine
Real Passing lane on the left
Normandy cemetery & visitor center
Castles
Belgium waffles
Favorite Stephenson's notes & pictures
Medieval cities
Trying to learn new languages
Polite Europeans
Fresh Pastries
Quiche
Nightwatchman
Jane the GPS
Down pillows
Clock tower innerworks
Yellow light to get ready for green
Heritage road signs

Could do without:
Autobahn as parking lot
Eating at McDonalds & Burger King
Paying for Internet
Feeling rushed
Lack of sleep
Coughing (I never got much better despite the z-pack)
Closed roads (although we have good stories)
Twin beds
Stinky Etap Hotel
Bunk beds
Expensive tolls in France
Me continuing to call the euro pound.
Paying for unclean toileten
Drizzly rain & cold
Stinky smokers

Things that make me smile:
Blake's missed opportunity list
  Men in capris
  Short shorts
  Double plaid outfits
Kara & Blake's disability rooms
Driving on a closed road
Church in multiple languages
Small sewer in tour I didn't understand
Pick pocket basilica
Tour guides who forget where they left off on their memorized schpeil
Ausfahrt signs

My Surreal Memories Coming Back

Several years ago I was casually looking around for a new job. At the time I was a member of a new philanthropic board. We met to talk about supporting a new after school program. In fact, when we began the program was in its planning stages. At one of the early meetings it was decided that the program would need a full-time director in order to really be successful. At the end of the meeting I approached the chair and said that I would like to more about the position because I might be interested. As I walked out and glanced back I thought I saw an excited look on her face.
Fast forward a couple of weeks (I went to Siberia to visit my missionary parents and some other things) when she called me and asked why I hadn't applied. I told her that the salary wasn't high enough. She asked what it would take and said OK after I gave my answer. Then she  invited me to have lunch with her, the assistant school superintendent, the head of social services and others that I can't think of right now in order to formalize things. We ate at her gas station restaurant and it was surreal.
This posting isn't really about that so I'll fast forward to this week.  The Foundation was started by Patricia Kluge and her husband William Moses. She was the board president.
Now I'll turn to journalists from Luxist to tell the next part:

Yesterday, Sotheby's, on behalf of billionaire Patricia Kluge, concluded the two-day auction of the contents of Kluge's home, Albemarle House. The sale, which totaled $15.1 million, exceeded pre-sale expectations of $9 million to $14 million.
Collectors, interior designers, and dealers from all over the world participated in the two-day auction. The auction followed the week-long exhibition at Albemarle House, Kluge's 45-room English country manor. The sale was 88.5% sold by lot with 61.5% of the sold lots achieving prices above their high estimates. The $15.2 million achieved brought Sotheby's overall total for sales of property from Kluge's collection (including sixteen pieces of jewelry sold on April 20, 2010) to $20.2 million.

It was kind of a big deal around here. There were some detractors because money generally brings controversy, but I have to say that Patricia and William were always generous and gracious with me during the 4+ years of our association.
That said, I felt kind of like a voyeur going through the photos on the Sotheby's Catalogue site to see the cost of things that I sat on, ate on, walked by, etc. on my visits to Albemarle House. I probably won't ever have another experience where a butler knows my drink preference without being told. Nor will I be asked to meet at the Africa Room by the pool, or a myriad of other things that might come from a movie, but the memories are fond and now I know that the dishes I ate from are definitely worth more than the ones in my cupboards.

Really?? The Unexpected Blessings of Doing Family History

Tonight I finally logged in to the new Family Search as requested by our church leaders. I clicked on the button to show me my pedigree chart and guess what popped up? The link that I've been looking for. At first I laughed out loud because it seemed so easy. Next I called a friend to let her know of my good fortune. Finally I got the courage to click on the link. You guessed it. Nothing happened. Maybe it is a time delayed link...

It only got more interesting when I found out that I am an only child and that my Aunt who does all of the genealogy isn't listed with my grandparents. In fact, I couldn't find her information anywhere and submitted it myself from a family group record that she had created. How funny is that?

Grandpa England, My Friend Wendy, and Thomas Jefferson

Today is their birthday. Grandpa would have been 101. What an amazing man! He isn't as well known as TJ, but he was perhaps even wiser. I always enjoyed my time with Grandpa. He was not only smart and wise, but gentle and kind as well. I loved, loved, loved working in his shop! This picture probably shows it the messiest I've ever seen it.

I have many fond memories of working with Grandpa. He owned rental homes, stores, and apartments so there was always work to do. We mowed lawns, shoveled snow, painted (although I don't ever remember him using a paintbrush), hauled garbage, cleaned clogged toilets, and performed many other tasks. I especially remember hauling garbage with Grandpa. I know that it sounds crazy, but it was usually fun. He sometimes let us ride on the bumper of his truck, once in a while we found treasures, and he always went fast over the railroad tracks on the way home so that we bounced around like a roller coaster. It was also very cool to pull up next to another full pickup at the dump. They would be working really hard to shovel or pull things out of the bed of the truck while we would get out, uncover the bed, turn a key, pull a knob, and the bed would lift up. All we usually had to do was pull forward a little bit and gravity did all of the work. Sometimes I would climb up and help push things down with my legs when friction was stronger than gravity, but it was always very easy and fast compared with all of the neighboring trucks. Grandpa's green truck even looked like a regular pick up which made the trick even more fun.

I will also be forever grateful to Grandpa and Dad for teaching me woodworking. Sometimes when I was at Grandpa and Grandma's house I would go home with a new toy or birdhouse made in Grandpa's shop. He always let me be part of the design team and often I even got to assemble the newest creation. I know that it took a lot of patience for him to let me be involved, and the end result may have been better without my help, but I am so grateful that I was included. Anytime children come to visit my shop I try to remember how Grandpa treated me so that I can help them to feel just as special and proud of whatever they make.

Happy birthday to Grandpa England, Wendy, and TJ!

Inaugural Stake Conference Talk

It is official. I have now been sustained as the Waynesboro Stake Young Women President. The same day that I was sustained I was asked to give a talk. That is what follows:

 

Set Standards   Set Goals   Set Limits

 

I’ve been asked to talk about how parents can help youth spend time in uplifting ways rather than doing things that waste time or degrade testimonies.

I know that parenthood is a sacred responsibility. We read in the Family Proclamation that “Parents have a sacred duty … to teach [their children] to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.”1

Parenthood is a sacred responsibility and I know it isn’t easy.

How can we help youth spend time in uplifting ways? We must set standards, set goals, and set limits.

Set Standards

What standards should we set? In D&C 45:9 The Lord says, “And even so I have sent mine everlasting covenant into the world, to be a light to the world, and to be a standard for my people…” The gospel should be our overarching standard. For the Strength of Youth presents the standards of the Church and specifically teaches youth how to apply them.2 Please use it in your homes. In relation to this, Pres Packer has said, that we are commanded to teach and maintain the standards of the gospel.3

 

I decided long ago that I wanted to follow the standard that the Lord had set. I want to follow Him. That is my overarching standard. I believe that it is yours as well. Does everyone in your family know that is the standard?

A standard is also something that sets the example or pattern. D&C 115:5 “Verily I say unto you all: Arise and shine forth, that thy light may be a standard for the nations.” You may remember that Sister Dalton YW pres talked about Brigham Young and others unfurling a banner atop Ensign Peak in the Salt Lake Valley to symbolize this standard to all nations. Two years ago she and her counselors reenacted this in order to call for a return to virtue.4 Brigham Young and Sister Dalton were setting a standard as leaders to help fulfill the commandment that the Lord gave in D&C 115 to arise and shine forth that their light would be a standard for the nations. They set the example.

Similarly parents must set the standard in their own family by being the example. Brigham Young placing the yellow bandana or Sister Dalton with the yellow shawl would have been meaningless if they didn’t follow it up with actions in daily life. It is important for us to talk with our families often about our standards. Actions speak louder than words so it is equally important to live these standards. One father of teens said that they make sure their teens see he and his wife participate in uplifting activities like saying prayers, reading scriptures, talking to parents, friends, etc. Also, that he and his wife make sure their teens see that the parents filter what watch on TV as an example.5 A mother of teenage boys said, “I think the biggest influence on my boys for using their time wisely has been their father’s example.”6

 

These parents make sure that their children know the standard. Captain Moroni made sure that the Nephites knew a different kind of standard. He made the standard of liberty. He carried it everywhere he went and “thousands did flock to his standard.7 Of course Moroni followed the overarching standard of the gospel and he was an example. He also understood the importance of a directed message.

Sometimes I have a specific standard to set the tone for my activities. This year it is, “Remember when in 2010”. This is my directed message for the year. I like to learn about history, and having a specific standard has helped me to set this as a priority. Because I have a catchy phrase I am more likely to be proactive in this regard. Moroni had a catchy phrase for a standard and look at the success he achieved with it.

Family standards help determine priorities. Please set standards.

Set Goals

When we know our standards it becomes easier to set goals. Please set family goals.

One specific goal I have set with my “remember when in 2010” is to finish the personal histories that I started with my parents last year. Working with my parents on their histories has brought us closer together. I’m not suggesting that your teens should be writing your histories, but you can find something that everyone can be involved in as you set family goals.

Family Home Evening, family prayer, and family scripture study should all be family goals. Also families should work together on Personal Progress with young women (mothers please earn the Personal Progress Award with your daughters) and Eagle Scout requirements with young men. Another family goal should be to have dinner nightly as a family    at a table without the TV or other distractions. An overwhelming amount of research shows that children from homes that have this type of family dinner are more successful in school, with friends, and later as adults. Life is busy, but family dinner is important because it provides time to be together and to have conversations.

Please set goals as a family.

Set Limits

When we set goals, and work towards them, it helps fill our time with worthwhile endeavors. Even so, it is important to have some down time. The family proclamation emphasizes the importance of down time because it includes “wholesome recreational activities” as an essential element of a successful marriage and family. 

Some of the youth I know have chosen Video games, Facebook, TV, and texting, as their preferred individual recreation. These aren’t necessarily bad but limits must be set.

Technology is important to teens. I also love technology. I use Twitter, Facebook, send text messages, and watch TV. These are things that easily can and sometimes have taken up way too much of my time. I have had to learn to set limits.

Determine with your teens a fair amount of time that they should spend on their preferred recreational activity. Ensure that goals regarding homework, chores, and other responsibilities are met before video games, Facebook, or other distractions are allowed. Sometimes you will have to say no and enforce the limits.

In relation to setting limits Bishop H. David Burton said, “Parents … often have a difficult time saying no to the demands of overindulged children. Their children run the risk of not learning important values like hard work, delayed gratification, honesty, and compassion.”8

 

Bishop Burton went on to say, “it is important for families and individuals to aggressively seek more of the virtues which go beyond this mortal life”.

It is important that we Set Standards, Set Goals, and Set Limits with our youth and ourselves so that we will aggressively seek more of the virtues which go beyond this mortal life.

---

1 The Family: A Proclamation to the World,  http://lds.org

2 Guidebook for Parents and Leaders of Youth [2001], 7

3 The Standard of Truth Has Been Erected, Ensign, November 2003.

4 “A Return to Virtue,” Ensign, Nov 2008, 78–80

5 Howard Brady, personal email

6 Sunny Hicken, personal email

7 Alma 62:5

8 “More Holiness Give Me,” Ensign, Nov 2004, 98

Subaru Outback: I Think I Love You

I remember the day more than 10 years ago when I bought my Outback. A friend and fellow teacher went with me on a December day when there was snow on the ground. I had done my research and we had already gone to several other dealers. In fact, one had the nerve to say that his job was a lot easier before the internet because people didn't know the actual cost of cars. I didn't buy from him, in part because he was a jerk, and also because they wouldn't give me a fair trade-in deal. The day of my purchase the salesperson reminded me of my teenage nephew. He was very young and eager. For the test drive he took us to an empty field covered with snow and told me to go for it. At first I thought that he was doing something sneaky, but soon another Subaru from the dealer joined us and they didn't hold back at all!

My Outback has been a very good car. Initially I needed all of the space for volleyball equipment on a frequent basis. Now I only use the space occasionally to transport things. The roof rack is handy for long wood pieces, but I never got around to getting a bike rack and when biking I just stick it in the back minus the front wheel.

Well, more than 10 years have passed and about two years ago I started to fall out of love. I had to replace the transmission, the dashboard is cracking, the floor mat is worn out, and the clearcoat is starting to peel off in some places on the roof. In November I learned that there is an oil leak and now there is an exhaust leak as well. My car is looking and feeling old. As a result, for about six months I've been talking about and researching new cars. Until now I had no intention of getting another Subaru. In fact, I was toying with the idea of a hardtop convertible. That would be really fun!

I fell in love all over again with my Outback this winter with all of the snow. During my years in Virginia I had forgotten how it performs in the snow. In an earlier post I wrote about helping others during the snowpocolypse. It was fantastic to be able to get out and help (and I love driving in the snow). Additionally, I was able to drive during other snow-in events when I otherwise might have felt isolated. More importantly I drove to the DC Temple and home one weekend without incident when it snowed a lot more than was predicted.

So now, I'm tempted to get another Subaru. Ten years ago I lived in Salt Lake City which is world famous for snow. Now I live in Central Virginia where the average snowfall is less than 15" per year. We had more snow this year than in the past 100, in fact at least one storm accumulated more than the historical yearly average. Should I base my decision on one unique winter? Is the love of driving in snow important enough to drive my decision?

My Outback has almost arrived at the 150,000 mile level. With all of the current budget issues, perhaps I simply keep it until it dies. If not, what should I buy?

Have You Done Any Good in the World Today?

I have heard a lot about people shirking responsibility or thinking only about themselves. Last week I was extremely impressed by Penn State University junior Pat Howley. I’ll get to his story later, but first let me give you some background.

Earlier this fall Darah Bonham embraced crowdsourcing through a novel idea with Twitter. He wanted to do something to help eradicate cancer so he set up a Twitter feed @abolishcancer and an abolishcancer blog. The goal of each was to solicit sponsors to the Twitter feed, raise awareness of the need, and raise funds for research. A sponsor would pick a date, and for every new follower of @abolishcancer for that day the sponsor would donate $1.00 to the American Cancer Society.

This started in October when Darah sponsored a day to try it out. Then Chari Olmedo (@irishcari) agreed to be the first official feed sponsor. She has never met Darah, but thought it was a great idea. Through her efforts there were 65 new followers and she donated $65 to the American Cancer Society. Other sponsors since then have seen similar results. I even sponsored a day in December. I tweeted about it all day long while I was at a conference and still only got 56 new followers. Well, let’s fast forward.

 A student group at Penn State called THON became aware of @abolishcancer. THON raises funds and awareness to fight against pediatric cancer. A group of them can be seen on YouTube chanting, “for the kids”. Anyway, Pat is active with this group and agreed to sponsor if he could donate the proceeds to THON. Of course Darah agreed and thus it began. Darah sent out tweets and Pat sent out tweets. Others retweeted until somehow it reached Khloe Kardashian. I don’t think that she became a follower, but she did tweet about it several times. At  the end of the day through her celebrity influence @abolishcancer had 1,734 new followers. For me, this is where the real story begins.

Pat is a college student who identifies as not having deep pockets. He thought he would pay about 50 bucks. I’m not sure what most people would have done in a similar situation, but Pat stepped up to the plate. He got creative and used other social media as well as old fashioned begging and according to the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, has raised over the $1,734.00 that he had promised.

Some of the new followers commented that they thought it was someone with “deep pockets” sponsoring the twitter feed for the day. I’m sure that many thought that Khloe would step up. However it wasn’t the wealthy, famous, or powerful that made this happen. I love this story because it is about average people doing what they can to make a difference. Let’s follow great example of Darah (for the idea) and Pat (for the commitment) and do something good and worthwhile for others.

The Millionaire is Not Me

Recently I read the book, The Millionaire Next Door. It was a fairly easy read and contained good information. The paperback edition that I read was published in 1998 when the economic outlook was far different than what we experience now. Even so, the main principles are still valid: create a budget and stick with it to save money. The authors give examples of the type of car the "average" millionaire owns, neighborhoods they live in, stores they shop in and so forth. According to them, millionaires don't tend to be flashy and they generally buy American cars.

I'm not terribly old, but I am single and do think about retirement needs in case a sugar daddy doesn't come along. Well, towards the end of the book, there is an equation to determine how much wealth one should have to prepare for retirement.  --Multiple your age times your pretax annual household income from all sources except inheritances. Divide by ten. This, less any inherited wealth, is what your wealth should be.--
Well, as my accountant friend, Krista, can attest I'm not great at maintaining great financial records. I don't have a record of my pretax income, however thanks to the Social Security Administration I recently received a record of my social security earnings. I know that this is lower than my pretax amounts, but you work with what you have...

Aforementioned friend, Krista sent me a very nice spreadsheet so all I had to do was plug in the numbers from the social security statement and voila! the amount of wealth pops up. I know that Krista is a wiz with spreadsheets, but I still double checked the formulas when I saw the amount of money that I should have as current wealth and compared it with my retirement savings. My number was half of what it should be according to the book!! Thankfully I remembered that wealth includes not just retirement savings, but also my other assets. With the addition of the equity in my house I'm in pretty good shape. Of course, at retirement I will still need somewhere to live, hmmm...

Snowpocolypse Junior

As you all probably know, we got over 2 feet of snow just before Christmas. Well, today we got another 8" when we were supposed to get 3-6". I had previously planned to drive to DC for a temple trip. I woke up early and felt really good about going. I got ready and drove off with about 1-2" on the ground. I thought that I would be the only one on the road, but I had company all along the way. As I was driving, memories of similar trips came back to me from my high school days.

I remembered driving home from Grantsville after a stake dance. The flakes were huge and reflected my headlights so it was almost easier to see the road without lights. One early morning I picked up Heidi Ferrin to go to a state honors orchestra event in Salt Lake. As I remember, she wasn't ready when I arrived at her house thinking that we wouldn't go due to the amount of snowfall. There weren't many other cars on I-80, but we made it in without issue and enjoyed the day.

Back to the present- The roads weren't yet plowed and it was pretty slushy on parts of 29 just as I left town. In fact, I fishtailed a little bit which was a good wake up to keep me alert the rest of the way. The snow fell consistently all the way to DC. I saw a few plows and lots of other cars and I continued to feel good about my trip. I know that I was being protected because there were several times that wrecks occured just before I arrived to a certain spot in the road and once a car spun out directly in front of me and both I and the car behind me were able to stop without incident.

The trip took a lot longer than usual because the average speed on the beltloop was less than 40 mph. My neck and shoulders were in knots from concentrating while driving, but I enjoyed my time in the temple immensely and am grateful that I was able to go as planned! Of course when I arrived (almost) safely home I took a little time to play in an empty parking lot. It was fun to spin around and let loose after being tense during my very long drive.

Lean Forward Leadership

In the past few months I've heard the term "lean forward" several times. The first was at my brother, RD's, retirement from the US Air Force. During the ceremony his commanding officer outlined the awards and accolades that RD had received. He pointed out that wherever RD served his team became more efficient and effective. At the end of the ceremony RD was given a chance to speak. He started by briefly commenting about each of his team members in attendance and described a couple of them as "lean forward" leaders. If I remember correctly, one of the team members who received this praise is an enlisted person. I generally think of officers as the "leaders". I loved the term and it struck me as even more cogent when it was used for someone I consider a "team member" more than a "leader".

I heard it again just over a week ago on the radio. President Obama was speaking about the horrible earthquake disaster in Haiti. He talked about the need for everyone involved in the rescue and relief effort to "lean forward" in their endeavors. I tried to find this speech without success, but a search with the words "Pres. Obama 'lean forward' Haiti" resulted in lots of related hits. I saw articles from the Wall Street Journal and the military, as well as blog posts.

What does it mean to lean forward?  Perhaps I can illustrate best with a non example. In several meetings this school year I've seen the escalator video where two people are "stuck" on the escalator between floors. They stay there shouting for help instead of simply climbing the rest of the way. As escalator riders it is simply their job to ride safely. These people know that it is the escalator's job (not theirs) to get them from one floor to another. A lean forward person would not only climb to the top, but would take the time to find the right person to notify that the escalator had stopped. To "lean forward" is to not only fulfill your job as assigned, but to actively look for additional ways to be useful. It is to search out ways to help the team to become more efficient and effective as a whole.


RD said that the Air Force frequently emphasizes the importance of leaning forward. My brother knows how to engender this lean forward attitude in others. He models it in his own actions, clearly empowers others, and rewards them as they demonstrate it. All of this combined in the outcomes of increased efficiency and effectiveness at every base he was located.

So, how can this principle be applied in education? We have a hierarchy in some ways similar to that of the Air Force. Often the teachers and other staff are seen as the "team members" and the administrators as the "leaders". Orders come from the departments of education in the form of standardized testing expectations. We can all simply do our jobs in the "lean back" style by fulfilling our contracts and working hard, or we can lean forward and find ways to help our teams be more effective and efficient. I propose that leaning forward is more important than ever before. The students in our care deserve the very best. We need to prepare them for a complex world where knowledge is a click away and critical thinking is essential to success. Classroom teachers must lean forward by finding ways to empower students to become collaborators in their own education. Subjects must become more integrated to better mirror real life. "Drill and kill" must cease as teachers and learners find authentic ways to meet the state standards.

Educational leaders should not only model a lean forward style, we must clearly empower school faculty and staff and reward them as they lean forward to improve education. Additionally students should be expected to lean forward as well.  I don't think enough leaning forward has happened yet in Haiti, and I pray that it will happen in large scale soon. I don't think that public education has had the equivalent of the Haitian earthquake, but right now the next few years look pretty bleak. Let's all lean forward to change that outlook before the really big earthquake hits.